Have you ever felt Rejected?

Do you feel useless, unwanted, unloved, not good enough?

Does one or more of these resonate with you?

Part 2

Thank you for coming to my blog, this is Part 2 so if you haven’t read part 1, may I suggest you take a look as it will help you to understand this one better Click Here

Words and how they can be misunderstood

Jane had a nickname “Pickle Puss”; the word “pickle” is also an affectionate term for mischievous, a little naughty ~ “you are being a pickle”, “that’s very picklish”. Which when it was said with a smile or a little laughter really helped Jane feel that it was OK, even that she was liked ~ she was too young to know the meaning of the word in this context. She felt she was being told this was who she was and this was OK.

As with all things eventually the charm wears off and “you are being a pickle” and “that’s very picklish” turned into “Don’t be such a pickle”.

That sense of rejection was back; Jane now felt she was being told not to be herself.

The word “Little” is another word for “small, petite or young” but it can also mean “insignificant”; there is a saying “Of little or no use”.

Jane’s family were living in Warrington and there was another family up the road who also had a young daughter called Jane. This Jane was a little older and so the families started to refer to them as Big Jane and Little Jane. Yes Jane was “Little” Jane and for whatever reasons she did not see it as a compliment.

By the time Jane started school in 1963 her parents had moved from Warrington to Bushey and it was when she started school that she changed her name and told everyone that she was called Sara (said Sarah).

This really confused the family but the school thought of her as Sara and so Sara it was.

Yes, this is my story, this all happened to me; to this day I still have the scar on my neck where the jumper stuck to it, a constant reminder to an accident that was the start of so many misunderstandings; of a child’s interpretation of situations and words that it was just not possible for the parents (my parents) to be able to explain because I was too young to understand.

Words: they can have different meanings depending on the context they are said or written in, the tone of voice used, even the expression on the persons face as they say them.

There is no age at which we understanding fully what the other person has meant; we all say things that others hear something different to what we meant; we all hear things and are surprised by what we are hearing ~ our interpretation).

Have you heard what the other person meant?

I’m serious ~ I could stand up in front of 100 people and say something and I could guarantee that there would be if not 100 different interpretations of what I have said, quite a few; not all 100 people will have heard what I meant.

It isn’t always down to the person who has made the comment, in a lot of cases it is the mood, the circumstances, the frustrations of the person hearing the comment or remark.

If you are “surprised” by what you hear from someone, ask “Did you mean what I heard?” (not “what you said”, because of course they meant what they said) then put into your own words what you heard. Hopefully this will help to clear the air and prevent a misunderstanding.

The same goes if you have said something and you see someone’s expression change ~ ask “What do you think I just said”, hopefully they will put it in their own words. Again it can be talked through and a misunderstanding avoided.

At the end of the last blog I asked you to share with me the answer to a question and I thank all of you that have so far ~ please keep that sharing coming.

I have another question for you and would love to hear your answers.

“What’s happening in your life as a result of these feelings of Rejection?”

Love, Peace & Light

Sara Jane

Marinya