Trauma & the Inner Child
By Sara Jane
On the day of writing this, I saw the following quote in a LinkedIn post:
“When you felt bad as a kid, who did you speak to?
Children don’t get traumatised because they get hurt. Children get traumatised because they’re alone with their hurt”
Quote: Gabor Mate, from “The Wisdom of Trauma” Movie
It touched a spot in me, gratefully a spot that is no longer raw.
In my case it started with an accident that meant I was in hospital for 3 months, seeing my parents once a week for an hour, due to hospital rules and other circumstances, not because my parents didn’t wish to be with me. I spent my first birthday in hospital.
At what age are we able to speak our feelings, to articulate and understand the feelings that are running riot in us.
I have heard it said too many times “children are resilient”
No, they are not. They don’t know how to ask for help or how to deal with the hurt and pain, both physical and emotional.
So, the way I see it is they bury it deep down inside of them and we keep doing that throughout our lives, even as adults when it is too difficult or we feel we haven’t got time to deal with it right away.
The hurt, pain and trauma don’t go away, they fester deep within us waiting for us to acknowledge them and help them heal.
Then one day they start to “speak” to us, trying to get our attention, initially it may be aches and pains, slowly the health issues get worse because we aren’t listening or understanding, until such time that it becomes something more serious, what many call a “wake-up call”
I had mine in the form of a broken jaw, broken by the dentist when extracting a wisdom tooth. I didn’t know it was broken for a week, it took a 2-hour operation to put it back in place as best they could and I then had 6 months of pain and sleepless nights.
My inner child was crying out to me and eventually I listened.
I came across this quote a number of years ago:
“As traumatized children we always dreamed that someone would come and save us.
We never dreamed that it would, in fact, be ourselves, as an adult” ~ Alice Little
Is your inner child trying to get your attention? Are you listening?
He/She requires to know that you love them, that you are listening to and hearing them.
Once they are secure in that love from you, your life will change, you will grow.
I know, it is the greatest gift I could have given myself.
Love yourself, all of you, every aspect of you, you are a unique and very special being.
Copyright © Sara Jane 2023